the cap fitting

A lot of women complain about being humiliated, abused or patronized by male health workers, but Tamara's experience shows that female health workers can be as bad if not worse than the men.

"I was feeling bloated and blotchy and needed a break from oral contraceptives," says Tamara. "I didn't trust my husband to use a condom - so I went to a clinic to get fitted for a cap."

"It was a clinic run by women for women," says Tamara, "and I felt perfectly safe and comfortable in what I expected would be a caring and sensitive environment."

"A lady doctor took my history and examined me - and she was fantastic - but then she handed me over to a nurse for a cap fitting and this is when I experienced the most humiliating incident of my life."

"The nurse was a lot older than you'd expect in such a clinic," says Tamara, "but I didn't really see that as being a problem."

"It was her appearance that gave me the creeps."

"She looked like one of those Nazi women who ran the concentration camps - big, brawny and manly," explains Tamara. "And this should have been a clue to what happened next."

"It was her job to fit me with a contraceptive cap - and a job that should have taken at most ten minutes took her close to half an hour."

"She shoved the caps up my vagina with the gusto of a man's thrust," says Tamara, "and kept on telling me that I was very difficult to fit."

"Not having a clue about the anatomy of my vagina in relation to other women's," says Tamara, "I trusted that she knew what she was talking about."

"After the third cap trial fitting I was getting very sore and told her so."

"To my amazement she then shoved some lubricant up my vagina and told me that the fitting won't take much longer."

"My instinct was to get up and leave in disgust, but having gone so far I felt I could endure this indignity for a while longer."

"She came back with a fourth cap and this time she put her fingers into my vagina and I screamed out 'what are you doing?' - and when I sat up and looked at her she was clearly getting her rocks off on what she was doing to me."

"On hearing me scream out the doctor in the next room suddenly appeared and took control of the situation."

"I went home with a cap - that may or may not have fitted me - but I never really used it much because it reminded me too much of the horrible experience I had been through at the clinic."

"The whole contraceptive issue is a thorn between my husband and I," sighs Tamara. "Neither of us want children - we're far too career orientated to be good parents - so if it comes to a toss up between my health and sex, guess which will win?"