morning after pills

Denise is single, 47 and a dedicated career woman who has sex so infrequently - and opportunistically - that she prefers to rely on the morning after pill than any other form of contraception.

"Let's face it," laughs Denise, "when you're 48 and an opportunity for a hot night with a handsome guy comes your way you're not going to want to spoil the moment with 'things' are you?"

"Even when a guy carries condoms - and uses them," says Denise, "I play safe and take the morning after pill."

"The last thing I need to happen to me at my age is a pregnancy," says Denise, "and while others may say that casual sex carries a lot more risks than pregnancy I disagree with them."

"I believe I have more chance of getting pregnant from a casual sexual encounter with a guy than I do getting an STD."

"I say this because the guys I am most likely to have casual sex with are married men who are unlikely to be riddled with diseases."

"They are out of town salesmen attending conventions and the first thing they want to show me is pictures of their wives and kids," laughs Denise. "They want a bit of fun while they are away from home - but they don't want to risk going with a prostitute. They feel as safe with me as I feel with them as far as STDs are concerned."

"Pregnancy is a different issue - and that's the one that concerns me. Yes, even at my age!"

"When I was younger and more sexually active I took the pill," says Denise. "But it's a bit silly at my age - when I may only have sex twice a year - to be popping a contraceptive pill every day."

"For the same reason, carrying around a cap or a tube of spermicide in my handbag is a bit over the top, too."

"The morning after pill is the very best sort of protection for me because I am in total control of my body."

"I think it is also guarantees a better result than any other mode of contraception."

"I have never trusted condoms and I think any women who relies on a man to protect her from pregnancy needs her head read."

"Sure, taking the morning after pill has some unpleasant side-effects," says Denise, "but at my age I am already putting up with hormone swings and irregular periods so what's new?"

"I'd rather have a hot night with a guy, be blooming the next day and go through a bit of discomfort for a few days after taking the pill miss out on that experience altogether."

"When you have sex irregularly - and opportunistically - like I do," laughs Denise, "you get to really enjoy the experience. And I mean really enjoy it!"

"I have a feeling, too, that being aware of the risk I am taking - in terms of an unwanted pregnancy - heightens the sexual experience."

"I certainly didn't enjoy sex on the 'pill' as much as I enjoy it now," says Denise, "but then I was having a lot more of it - and when you're having a lot of something it does tend to lose its magic, doesn't it?"

"The daily pill was definitely an improvement on what women had to put up with before," says Denise, "but I hated taking that pill every day and for women who are having sex, say once a week, I'd thoroughly recommend using the morning after pill as an alternative."

the cap fitting

A lot of women complain about being humiliated, abused or patronized by male health workers, but Tamara's experience shows that female health workers can be as bad if not worse than the men.

"I was feeling bloated and blotchy and needed a break from oral contraceptives," says Tamara. "I didn't trust my husband to use a condom - so I went to a clinic to get fitted for a cap."

"It was a clinic run by women for women," says Tamara, "and I felt perfectly safe and comfortable in what I expected would be a caring and sensitive environment."

"A lady doctor took my history and examined me - and she was fantastic - but then she handed me over to a nurse for a cap fitting and this is when I experienced the most humiliating incident of my life."

"The nurse was a lot older than you'd expect in such a clinic," says Tamara, "but I didn't really see that as being a problem."

"It was her appearance that gave me the creeps."

"She looked like one of those Nazi women who ran the concentration camps - big, brawny and manly," explains Tamara. "And this should have been a clue to what happened next."

"It was her job to fit me with a contraceptive cap - and a job that should have taken at most ten minutes took her close to half an hour."

"She shoved the caps up my vagina with the gusto of a man's thrust," says Tamara, "and kept on telling me that I was very difficult to fit."

"Not having a clue about the anatomy of my vagina in relation to other women's," says Tamara, "I trusted that she knew what she was talking about."

"After the third cap trial fitting I was getting very sore and told her so."

"To my amazement she then shoved some lubricant up my vagina and told me that the fitting won't take much longer."

"My instinct was to get up and leave in disgust, but having gone so far I felt I could endure this indignity for a while longer."

"She came back with a fourth cap and this time she put her fingers into my vagina and I screamed out 'what are you doing?' - and when I sat up and looked at her she was clearly getting her rocks off on what she was doing to me."

"On hearing me scream out the doctor in the next room suddenly appeared and took control of the situation."

"I went home with a cap - that may or may not have fitted me - but I never really used it much because it reminded me too much of the horrible experience I had been through at the clinic."

"The whole contraceptive issue is a thorn between my husband and I," sighs Tamara. "Neither of us want children - we're far too career orientated to be good parents - so if it comes to a toss up between my health and sex, guess which will win?"