menopausal mad cow
Delores, 48, has become known in her workplace as a ‘mad cow’ following a blow-up with her estranged husband when he confronted her at work, and while this sort of incident could just as easily have happened to a younger woman there is no getting away from the fact that most incidents like this do involve older menopausal women.
"Let's face it," says Delores, "young women are more likely to have good news than older women.”
“Everyone loves to hear about a new romance, a new baby, a new house, a new car, a skiing trip, a new band or any number of the new things that young people are getting up to. Nobody wants to hear about an abusive husband, your father's death rattle, the trouble you’re having with children or the progress of your menopause treatment."
“I believe women over 40 typically facing life crises such as divorce, the care and imminent death of parents, menopause and the empty nest,” says Delores, “and add the pressures of being a working mother to this equation and the result can be catastrophic.”
“These life events can happen concurrently, and often do, sometimes triggering a serious illness to compound the misery.”
"Ultimately," says Delores, "I’ll have to find another job. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to live down what happened here. And I’m not out of the woods yet by a long shot. Anything can and probably will happen.”
“I won’t feel safe until that man is locked up for life," says Delores, “and then, maybe, I’ll get around to doing something about my menopausal symptoms.”
"Let's face it," says Delores, "young women are more likely to have good news than older women.”
“Everyone loves to hear about a new romance, a new baby, a new house, a new car, a skiing trip, a new band or any number of the new things that young people are getting up to. Nobody wants to hear about an abusive husband, your father's death rattle, the trouble you’re having with children or the progress of your menopause treatment."
“I believe women over 40 typically facing life crises such as divorce, the care and imminent death of parents, menopause and the empty nest,” says Delores, “and add the pressures of being a working mother to this equation and the result can be catastrophic.”
“These life events can happen concurrently, and often do, sometimes triggering a serious illness to compound the misery.”
"Ultimately," says Delores, "I’ll have to find another job. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to live down what happened here. And I’m not out of the woods yet by a long shot. Anything can and probably will happen.”
“I won’t feel safe until that man is locked up for life," says Delores, “and then, maybe, I’ll get around to doing something about my menopausal symptoms.”
"I've been separated now for five months," says Delores, "and I had to move into a separate apartment with my children when my husband became so abusive that I feared for our lives".
"All of this time I've been carrying on as normally as I can at work," says Delores, "but it is very difficult for me to maintain my usual friendly and calm customer service when my life is falling apart at the seams."
"I'm crying one minute then being rude the next and my co-workers are noticing my change in behavior as much as my customers are."
"At first they were sympathetic." says Delores, "but after an incident at work when my husband came in and abused me - in front of everyone - I guess they reached their saturation level as far as sympathy and support is concerned."
"I am mortified that the incident with my estranged husband made me and act like a mad old cow in front of my co-workers," sighs Delores. "Had I been a younger woman, around their ages, I am sure they would have reacted differently."
"Let's face it, this sort of incident with an abusive partner could just as easily happen to a younger woman," says Delores, "but because I am 48 and the raving mad mad they saw at work was 58, I guess they just don't relate to the situation."
"All they saw was an old man and his old lady having a fight at work."
"Maybe the relationships they are in have not reached the stage where they cannot stand their partner," explains Delores. "Maybe they are not yet old enough to have experienced the pressure required for a blow up."
"I'm doing my best to get my life back together," says Delores, "but it's very unpleasant at work with everyone avoiding me."
"Yes, I think ageism has a lot to do with my situation at work," claims Delores. "My supervisor and my co-workers are all younger than myself, by at least ten years, and that matters."
Read more by Delores on this situation:"All of this time I've been carrying on as normally as I can at work," says Delores, "but it is very difficult for me to maintain my usual friendly and calm customer service when my life is falling apart at the seams."
"I'm crying one minute then being rude the next and my co-workers are noticing my change in behavior as much as my customers are."
"At first they were sympathetic." says Delores, "but after an incident at work when my husband came in and abused me - in front of everyone - I guess they reached their saturation level as far as sympathy and support is concerned."
"I am mortified that the incident with my estranged husband made me and act like a mad old cow in front of my co-workers," sighs Delores. "Had I been a younger woman, around their ages, I am sure they would have reacted differently."
"Let's face it, this sort of incident with an abusive partner could just as easily happen to a younger woman," says Delores, "but because I am 48 and the raving mad mad they saw at work was 58, I guess they just don't relate to the situation."
"All they saw was an old man and his old lady having a fight at work."
"Maybe the relationships they are in have not reached the stage where they cannot stand their partner," explains Delores. "Maybe they are not yet old enough to have experienced the pressure required for a blow up."
"I'm doing my best to get my life back together," says Delores, "but it's very unpleasant at work with everyone avoiding me."
"Yes, I think ageism has a lot to do with my situation at work," claims Delores. "My supervisor and my co-workers are all younger than myself, by at least ten years, and that matters."
Labels: ageism, divorce, estrangement, mad cows, marriage, menopause, restraining order, sad sacks, separated women, separation, workplaces
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