female health matters

Personal stories about female health matters.

January 08, 2007

a happy fatty!

Loretta is 26 and a great communicator. She's currently out of work and correctly states that her size is a drawback in the job market.

"I love fast food, and I'm proud of being a large girl -- a happy fatty -- and I have a philosophical attitude about my size and my prospects of gaining another job quickly."

"I have a great resume and I've reached preliminary interview stage for lots of jobs," says Loretta, "but I always lose out on actually getting the job. I guess a skinny person always comes first -- buy hey, I happy about coming second just as long as I get a job!"

She has tons of enthusiasm and a can-do attitude - which employers appreciate -- and she knows that making it to the preliminary interview is a monumental victory in itself.

"A lot of people don’t get that far," sighs Loretta, "but some of the interviews I've been to have been awful. You know the type -- when their jaws drop when you walk into the room."

She has come to the conclusion that despite what employers state they want, the main criteria upon which you're judged at the preliminary interview is your appearance -- but particularly your size.

Loretta takes pains to read up about the history of the company, and she learns the name of the CEO as well as key personnel, but she feels it never does her any good because she doesn’t pass muster at interviews because she's too fat.

“I’m short, dumpy and average looking -- just like my parents and boyfriend,” laughs Loretta, “and that’s the way I am and employers can either like me or lump me. I’m not going to put myself down or go on some starvation diet just because I don’t fit the image of what they think women are supposed to look like."

"Sure, I’m fat, but I’m happy fat.”

“Everyone goes to interviews looking their very best,” says Loretta, “but it is an unfortunate fact of life that being immaculately groomed and dressed is not enough. Our society places a great deal of emphasis on height, build and looks. If you’re tall, slim and good-looking then you have a great deal in your favor from the minute the interviewer catches sight of you -- if that is his or her preference -– and this subjective assessment is especially common in the type of industry I target -- media, arts and advertising.”

In Loretta’s previous temp job with a high-profile publishing company the unofficial way of interviewing women for new positions was for the men in that company to check out the hapless applicant in the reception area and rate her from 1-10.

“Believe me,” sighs Loretta, “while you are sitting there in the reception area watching all the busy people coming and going, they are not always coming and going on official business. Someone like me would get a rating of minus-10 from those guys. It’s not fair, but that’s the way the world is.”

Loretta is quick to add that this does not mean that if you’re of average appearance, you don’t stand a chance.

"The vast majority of women are average looking, and more than slightly overweight, just like me," says Loretta, "and our time will come when all the slim good lookers have got jobs. Just because you're fat you shouldn't think you're not good enough for a top job. You are, and so am I."

Loretta adds there are types of positions where good looks may be a disadvantage -- and women who take this whole emphasis on appearance to its logical conclusion should ask themselves: “Would I really want to work for a company where my appearance is more important than my human qualities?”

Loretta knows that this type of subjective selection criterion is discriminatory, but she philosophically accepts that despite all manner of laws to stamp out discrimination of any description it is a cruel fact -- if not a natural tendency -- that some companies have a subtle policy of choosing their employees solely on appearance and mainly on size.

“It would be foolish to discount it as a prime factor in our selection for a job or a mate or even a girlfriend,” claims Loretta.

"After appearance, communication is judged," says Loretta, " and unless I’ve already spoken at length on the telephone with somebody from the company employers have no real way of knowing whether I can string two words together until they interview me."

"Luckily for me, I have great communication skills and I believe that women who are articulate without being pompous, informative without being boring and chatty without being garrulous, will always make a good impression -- despite their obesity.”

She is never nervous about asking all the questions she needs to ask about the job. She is well aware that interviews are two-way streets and she enjoys interviewing the interviewers!

As Loretta points out, she wants to be happy in this job, and if an interviewer is not amenable to answering all of her questions then she picks up very quickly that she has already been disqualified for the job on account of her appearance not being good enough.

“Sometimes when I walk into interviews I see jaws drop,” sighs Loretta. “They just don’t expect a fat woman to be applying for the job, and that’s really stupid because some of the interviewers are fatter than I am.”

“I think another very important factor in the initial interview process is whether you’re extraverted or not,” explains Loretta. “The introvert is at a great disadvantage at the initial interview stage and it’s no good pretending you’re bright, outgoing, a real ‘people’ person and always enthusiastic when you are not -- and especially not that way when under the pressure of an interview.”

Loretta is reasonably outgoing, but admits that sometimes the pressure of an interview dampens her enthusiasm.

“Some positions,” says Loretta, “require a retiring type, someone who can cope with spending a lot of time alone, but most jobs require a great deal of human interaction for which the introvert is not suited. I feel sorry for women who aren’t as outgoing as I am because their chances of getting a job are not good, so being slim and beautiful is not always as important as an extraverted personality.”

“A good interviewer,” explains Loretta, “will also be able to elicit if you have a genuine interest in people outside of yourself. It’s about empathy. If you belong to a few community organizations, like I do, and can talk easily and truthfully about the community work you do, then you will be highly regarded no matter what sort of position you are applying for and however fat you are.”

Loretta is involved with her local arts community catering for disabled children and she believes it not only proves that she has community spirit but also an empathic nature, an ability to get on with people, which is a highly desirable trait to have when so many jobs these days, even the top jobs, require a ‘people’ person.

“Also,” adds Loretta, “when so many jobs these days are customer service orientated -- just talking to people on the telephone -- being overweight shouldn’t be a problem, but I guess employers are worried about health concerns and liability. If I fell down the steps because my tummy is too big to see where my feet are going, I guess employers would be worried about employing me.”

“Anyway, it’s only a matter of time before I get another job,” smiles Loretta. “In the meantime I’m getting lots of practice with my interview skills and piling on the pounds eating twice as much as I would be if I were working!”

"Like I said, I'm a happy fatty and I'm not going to get depressed about the shallow prejudices of others."

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